Archive for September 8th, 2007

More on LCS

Saturday, 8 September 2007

In a previous post I referred to Lavell Crawford, a Last Comic Standing Finalist, as “Fat Blackie”. I didn’t remember his name at the time and didn’t feel like looking it up. Today while doing other things, I remembered.

I admire Crawford for doing jokes about what he knows: being fat and black. However I’m bored by these same antics, since it never stops.

All of Gerry Dee’s stuff I’ve heard in other parts of the show. I know he’s got to “bring it” but is that all he has?

Jon “Hickory” Reep has not done the same bit twice, as far as I can tell. Or maybe he has and I’m just not paying attention. I got nuthin’ against blue collar comedians, my favorite of whom is Ron “Tater Salad” White.

Another aside: there was another non-contestant besides Shakey performing on last week’s show (9-5-07) who I knew previously as the lead in a Disney “comedy” about Mars. In the trailer he farts in his space suit (real laff riot, asshole).

Watching him make a fool of the audience (for laffing at his lame shit) I wanted to beat this son of a bitch with his own arm, he’s worse than even Mr. Bean.

That is all.

“Self-help”

Saturday, 8 September 2007

Occasionally I read self-help books (for free from the liberry) and will continue to do so, altho now I understand what “self-help” really means.

Turns out the hyphen was throwing everyone off…it’s an alternate spelling for “Sell Fhelp.”

What is fhelp (pronounced “felp”)? It’s bullshit that’s been given the 5-Star treatment, sculpted to look like a brownie and frosted with outrageous claims.

Later on I’ll more perfectly describe the process, but typically a self-help book can be identified by a few characteristics.

1) A redefining of ordinary words, and plenty of silly new acronyms

2) An author with zero credibility but plenty of chutzpah

3) A point where the author gently explains that there’s nothing that can help a person but themselves, including the book/tapes they wasted money on, so take ACTION, whatever it may be.

Why do I still read Sell-Fhelp books? I like the quotes borrowed from famous people who faced real problems, I enjoy laughing at the new acronyms, and it fuels my hatred of con-men and -women.

Fuck ’em all, and You, for buying their fhelp.

Blogs keep it real?

Saturday, 8 September 2007

Blogging be like going out  in public, which usually be a choice.   It does something to the mental to be partially-exposed rather than just typing into a virtual diary disconnected from the net.

I enjoy milk, especially in the “light-proof” thick yellow plastic jug.  It could  be a complete illusion that shielded milk tastes better than regular, but I buy into the Milk Matrix.

Time to sleep.