Giving away Nobels like condoms in elementary schools

Right on the heels of The Obamessiah’s Nobel Prize, I too awakened to discover this…

I’m still in shock at winning. But I shouldn’t be, as I was already Time’s Person of the Year in 2006.

Oh wait, I almost forgot!

Hey, let me be the first to congratulate you. Be sure to bring your Nobel Prize to any participating Arby’s for $3 off.

BONUS VIDEO: Steven Crowder presents: I GOTS’ A PEACE PRIZE!

Winter begins when I SAY it begins

The middle of December and still using a/c. 

A disgrace, in every sense of the word.

My nuts already belong to creditors and the asshole job.  I’d rather they freeze.

Fucking rotten weather.