Death will be my Christmas

“There’s nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.”  –Erna Bombeck

It’s 0140, Christmas morning.  I stopped being a child long ago.  There is very little of me left.

I like adulthood for being able to tune out Christmas music and ignore decorations.  The economy has so many people on edge that spray-snow-in-a-can optimism and cheer has dropped off.  Fatigue is in the air like burning tire smoke.  I want to take a chainsaw to the size of our criminal government, carve it down to something small and useful, like a pocketknife.

I went to the drugstore to peruse the As Seen on Tv crap.  Everything was still $19.99.  No Chia Pets!

No one needs a Chia Pet, that’s why it’s brilliant.  I don’t need one: I have dope.

I’ve smoked-out only once, “in moderation”.  I felt no happier.  I am going through the motions of being alive.

I saw a girl in the drugstore.  Tan jacket and ponytail, not ugly, not beautiful, but lovely.  Life.  I looked at her head, at the chestnut ponytail.  Life.  How pointless and precious.

I didn’t buy shit.  I had bought shit earlier, elsewhere.  I averaged approx. $50 per person times 5, an enormous sum for me.

I’d make it a thousand but I don’t have it.

I hate gifts, even getting them.  Let me explain.  I live in America, do you?  We can get nearly anything we want at any time of year (if you want pot all you gotta do is befriend 3 strangers).  Gifts:  if someone I know wanted something badly and I could afford it, I’d get it for them.  The people I know need what they want, they don’t waste.   I don’t like being forced to do anything; take something pleasurable like buying a gift for someone, and make it mandatory.  That’s hell.

You cannot opt out of the gift game unless you are a hermit.  I’ve tried.  It’s horrible to receive anything when you have nothing to give in return.  And yes, I tried warning everyone I knew not to give me anything.  It doesn’t work.

I have no useful advice for surviving holidays, any of them.  Enjoy what you can.

Death will be my Christmas.   Not suicide but natural death, I can wait.  I look forward to the change of pace and new environment, even in Hell.  It’s hell anyway to be alive yet numb.

SHOULD OBAMA WIN/SHOULD McCAIN WIN

DISCLAIMER: I’m telling you straight up, I’m voting for John Sydney McCain III and Sarah Louise Heath Palin and this post reflects that POV. If you’re going to vote for Barack Hussein Obama, remember to vote on November 5th. Or be punished with a baby.

REGARDING BOTH MEN: I’m disappointed neither said much about freedom, optimism and America’s unique greatness during this election. I’m extremely disappointed neither man said anything about the Constitution and limiting government power. At least with McCain there’s an inkling of hope in regaining sanity, while Obama thinks, as all liberals must, the Constitution was written on an Etch-A-Sketch and is his to shake away the parts he doesn’t like (or add a RIGHT to everything from free cable to personal bodyguards to stop school bullies).

SHOULD OBAMA WIN it’s tempting to say that America as we know it will pass away. But don’t. There’s plenty to be positive about. We’re not quite there as far as a Second Civil War goes, if only because no one really knows what they’re fighting for or against. Confusion reigns and it’s preferable to anarchy.

SHOULD OBAMA WIN (not by a “landslide”, he’s not the other Hussein) there’s no reason for melodrama or pessimism. Democracy is self-correcting, and Barry’s Ascension might prove a real blessing, galvanizing the Right in a way not seen since ’94, when Congress after 40 years flipped to a Republican majority, keeping Billy Clinton in check, despite his lack of pants.

SHOULD OBAMA WIN how fast people caught in the middle wake up and realize they’ve re-elected Jimmy Carter with a better tan depends on how fast Obama’s economic schemes are unleashed. My guess is he’ll be low-key for “the first 100 daze”, drinking in the worship of the mainstream media, until even they will have quieted, waiting for the show to begin, SHOULD OBAMA WIN.

No matter how hard the media will try to conceal the ensuing flops and failures of what is essentially regurgitated marxism, the matured internets will be there as never before, documenting every misstep. I don’t mind the ignorance or foolhardiness of the American people, as long as it hurts. Stupid should hurt, and when you put your hand on a hot stove it’s your hand that should burn, no one else’s.

SHOULD McCAIN WIN it will be nothing less than a second chance for America. McCain isn’t a maverick so much as a 3-legged dark horse. He’s going to need a complete overhaul, including a visit from the ghost of Reagan. Republicans have been shitting the cot on their core values for so long that the lies of the left aren’t worth addressing, there’s too much to be done. There are bodies stacked to the rafters in the cellar: compromised, sissified Rightards still in office have no time to worry about a dead dog planted on the stoop by the New York Slimes.

SHOULD McCAIN WIN or even if he loses, these second-chance Republicans better get back to principles or they’ll find they have a very short shelf life; when it’s time to act they’ll either be fresh and ready or thrown away. That’s as it should be. Nothing less than their best will be acceptable, and should they keep on doing the same things they’ve been doing, they will deserve their crucifixions. SHOULD OBAMA WIN, true conservatives, already livid, will be trembling among stacks of wooden boards and nail guns.

I really wish the ticket was Palin-McCain. But you can’t have everything.

The most important thing you can take from this enjoyable babble is this: America was founded by people smarter than you and me. They split the government’s power into thirds so that no President could turn into a monarch, nor a mob of shits like Congress into the Central Comittee. We also have 200 million guns, and despite what politically-correct weenies may believe, we don’t run from a fight.

Take a break from pessimism

How much pain they have cost us, the evils which have never happened. –Thomas Jefferson

…it has never been my way to bother much about things which you can’t cure.
– Mark Twain – A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court

I watched too many political vids on youtube tonight.
The idiocy, ignorance, paranoia, doomsaying, etc. was just too much for my tender sensibilities.

Although I cannot claim to rising above feeling anxious and threatened by the many ominous challenges of the future (Chinese world dominance, terrorists with nukes, collapse of the dollar and following right behind it like a booby prize in a box of Fruit Loops, the dreaded Amero) I’m trying to realize on a conscious level that all these macro problems can go fuck themselves. Like Jefferson wrote, most of these things never happen, and when they do, the terrifying tiger behind the door often turns out to be a kitten.

So then there’s hope:

…it is a blessed provision of nature that at times like these, as soon as a man’s mercury has got down to a certain point there comes a revulsion, and he rallies. Hope springs up, and cheerfulness along with it, and then he is in good shape to do something for himself, if anything can be done.

– Twain – Connecticut Yankee…

Although I can’t prove it, in the frequent absence of hope the human will still abide, because no other creature is interested by half in seeing what happens next.