Kylo Ren, don’t make me feel gay

 

I don’t like feeling gay.

Gay in this sense has nothing to do with homosexuality, it’s a kind of shame or embarrassment by association with an object or idea ruined by obviousness, obnoxiousness or nescience.

The word “ghey” has been offered as a way to describe this feeling but it’s bullshit for two reasons:

1) ‘Gay’ had several other meanings before homosexual, and gays from that time forward didn’t offer an alternate spelling to separate themselves from the original meaning.

2) The well-intentioned but foolish adopter of “ghey” is left having to spell G-H-E-Y after saying, “gay” so as not to offend nearby gays. Who needs extra work?

Saw this today at the supermarket and yes, it made me feel gay:

I understand putting other SW characters on the boxes, including the fucking soccer ball that doesn’t need to eat. But how can Kylo Ren, wimpy-named villain and Vader groupie give a fuck about nutrition or pleasing kids, especially with a product name as GAY as GO-GURT?

More laughable is the new SW movie is rated PG-13, which means there’s a possibility of KR decapitating some poor fool with a lightsaber. This could be the Madonna/Pepsi controversy of this decade, especially since the new lightsaber looks like a burning cross.

 

 

 

 

And then there’s this:  

 

SLURP SABER.  

Slurp Saber…is funny.  

 

VITAL UPDATE:  The Force Awakens has been out for a few weeks.  By featuring Kylo Ren, Go-Gurt is advocating patricide.  Seems about right. 

 

The US Military: now with gay lamb cannons

It seems gays will finally be allowed to OPENLY SERVE in the military, another case of an asshole liberal activist judge overriding the will of the people.

Folks, it doesn’t matter whether you’re for openly-serving gays in the military or not:  when judges legislate from the bench and override processes set in place to properly change laws, that is called ‘tyranny’.

You can stop reading now if you wish, the major flaw with this corrupt decision has just been exposed.

Still here?  OK.

My problem with openly-serving gays in the military isn’t gays…it’s the patently dishonest way the politically-correct subversives will downplay and hide results IF the results of this experiment are not positive.  They’ve already done this with women in the military.  I’m not saying there shouldn’t be women in the military, but I AM saying I doubt there will ever be an honest accounting of all the additional expenses and problems caused by the presence of women.

With the arrival of ‘open-gay’ soldiers, the list of problems is just unfurling.  Expect reports of unwanted sexual advances and harassment (already a problem with women around) to increase.  How about gay soldiers who contract HIV while in the service, further burdening the strained military medical system?  AIDS drugs and care ain’t cheap.  Another even more pressing problem is living arrangements…if gays can’t legally marry, can the military make a non-military partner a spouse in government housing?

And last but not least, the US Thugverment long ago “solved” the problem of natural human inequality by making every other lifeform except the Straight White Male a protected species, subject to preferential treatment.  Now we can finally add poo-pushers to the list (surely there’s already an LGBT Celebration Month already in the works) right below the protected-class muslim vermin that shot up Fort Hood and got away with it because a few smart cowards didn’t want to jeopardize their careers and be labeled RACISTS.

The legitimate purpose of the military is to kill people (enemies) and break the enemies’ shit ’till the enemy don’t want to fight no more.  The obamateurs (and to an extent, their predecessors) have turned our killing machines into legally-bound goodwill ambassadors who now have to play by all sorts of rules that only get them killed, or court-martialed when they do the right thing and ignore them.  Now you’ve got Pussy on the left and Faggy to the right, in addition to Diaperhead and his rocket launcher hiding just over the next rock outcropping, and you can be court-martialed for hurting ANY of their feelings.

I’m already looking forward to the absolute slaughter of taxocrats this November 2nd…if this gay nonsense enrages even more voters to eject the commie bastards then hoo-rah.

On many days I simply don’t give a shit

Been wandering the web aimlessly lately. I don’t want to get into it now except to say for every murderous muslim cocksucker there appears to be a gang of apologists and appeasers to justify–there’s no more apt word–to JUSTIFY the evil of the death-cult killers. These fools could just have easily ended up in the crosshairs as the next infidel, and yet here they are, defending the shitbirds.

You can be the most vile piece of shit and commit heinous acts, but those deemed insensitive or politically incorrect are treated even more harshly.

It’s a terrible world.

For no particular reason I watched the 12-part youtube docu about mafia killer-for-hire Richard Kuklinski, “The Iceman”, an equal-opportunity murderer. It was not uplifting. Then I watched a docu about Richard Ramirez, The “Night Stalker”, a craven piece of shit the fucking cops whisked away from mob justice. I’ve been an atheist (and now a tepid monotheist) but with these horrible serial killer bastards running around I understand why anyone would doubt the existence of any god, at least a caring one.

My own life is in the shitter. Not really, but it is. Too much shit left untied, unsaid, while other shit is done sloppily. The past weighs like an anvil on my scrotum. I just hate people and can’t seem to shake the feeling that I’m right. I can’t even get the fucking lesbian at work to come eat tacos (ha ha) with me. And no, I don’t want to fuck her, that’s why I can talk to her.

I don’t know if there is such a thing, but there appears to be a dread balance to the world. Things steadily improve but the horrors that counterweigh the good grow heavier and heavier. Smallpox is eradicated, here comes the AIDS. A dictator dies and he’s got 8 bastard sons to take his place. On the rare occasions Good triumphs it’s quickly buried and forgotten so that the next round of fools must needlessly live the same nightmares. I’m so very fucking annoyed with this planet. And there’s work tomorrow, I won’t have another day off till Monday. Work is hell, all work is, but being out of a job is worse (except for the first 20 minutes of waking up).

On many days I simply don’t give a shit. And by “days” I mean “years”.

The sorry state of the State Song

Florida’s State Song, “Old Folks at Home” is under assault in our shitty Politically Erect Age, suddenly “controversial” due to lyrics written in 1851.

I’d be more inclined to agree if anyone remembered anything but the tune. Also, the offensive terms can easily be changed.

Someone made a terrific video to go with the foremost awful attempt at replacing Florida’s state song with Florida (Where the Sawgrass Meets the Sky). How clever to put the word “Florida” in a song about the State of Florida! Strangely the lyrics leave out horrendous automobile drivers, horrible humidity and giant cockroaches (although at 1:30 “cultures rich” does sound a little like “cockroaches”).

To me the Florida tune sounds like a Disneyfied (apt) mutation of O Canada (apter) and snippets of the Jurassic Park Theme Song (aptest due to humidity).

Your opinion will most certainly vary.

This would make a much better Florida State Song. I know what’s best.