Posts Tagged ‘pornette’

Marc and Me: a love/hate rant

Sunday, 11 November 2007

Way back in the early 90s, the four major Cocks of the Compass were Peter North, Marc Wallice, Tom Byron and TT Boy. Of course even then there were many other fellows (and hundreds more now thanks to the web and Cialis) but back in my Time of Pre-jaculatory Innocence it was possible to be familiar with every major starlet’s work and know the names of all the main cocksmen without being Rain Man.

As anyone who’s seen more than one porn movie knows, only the female faces change, a fact “mostly true” even today.

Though I look and “act” nothing like him, over time I “came” to identify with Marc Wallice the most. Wallice’s sexual adventures served as surrogate for my absent, nonexistent ones. I never liked him and still don’t, but as a familiar face in an ever-changing world of cunt, Wallice became sort of a “comfort cock”, exposed to as wide a variety of vaginas as a master chef’s menu.

Chalk it up to inevitability that Wallice as well as the other three aforementioned cocksmen fucked my personal favorite porn starlet several times over the years, leaving me with a permanent welt of blasphemy and loss.

(Aside: When a girl I knew described her feelings about the dudes in porn as “watching someone’s Jewish Dad”, I knew she meant either Wallice or Randy West).

It was already the 21st century when an acquaintance I’d met mentioned he once read an interview where Wallice described being in early morning LA traffic, smirking and gleeful that all the poor slobs around him had to go to some shit job while he was going to get laid and paid.

Whether or not that anecdote is true, I was the last to know that six years earlier, karma visited Wallice with extreme prejudice: he was discovered to be HIV+ and suspected of taking 6 or 7 pornettes down with him, making him a permanent porn pariah (though as late as 2003, it’s rumored he’s been directing/editing with his name off the credits).

My favorite line of the Wallice bio:

Sexually, Wallice cast himself out, and spent much of his time masturbating to magazines and past porn dalliances.

To this day I cannot say, “Past porn dalliances” without blasting the room with hard laughter. (Googling the above emboldened quote you can access Wallice’s personal story on Google Groups).

Over the years my pathetic life has been witness to Wallice’s many conquests, sadly lived vicariously through him; that the pornettes eternally spread their legs only for money is irrelevant. I was amazed and saddened to learn of the end of Wallice’s active career…without him I am alone, adrift on the treacherous sickening seas of present porn without his (Peter?) North Star to sail by.

I was also, of course, filled with only the finest schadenfreude that Wallice, lanky, hook-nosed, pony-tailed bi-sexual fuck machine was cast out of the pornosphere at last, as if now I somehow have a chance of catching up to the 1000s of vaginas and rectums his hooked horn has dipped inside.

What a truly pathetic and non-gay love/hate letter to a man I’ll never meet or want to meet.

The Pornette: Unanswered, Living Why

Wednesday, 31 October 2007

If there’s such a thing as a Liar’s Resume, the LA version must include having “dated” a porn star. Every time the subject “came up” in a group of guys, at least one would “confess” to such a tryst. During my years in the LA shithole even I’d been up close to a few working pornettes, just not as their date or “partner”. The energy of “The Industry” is poisoned, what an Old Testament Jew might call “unclean”. Lust has no effect and nothing to do with it; lust is a real emotion and pornettes radiate only lube and glitterdust.

With the exception of parasitic dudes seeking a free lunch from Jenna Jameson-level millionaires, I can’t understand why porn stars get married.
“How was your day, honey?”
“I was the cum-soaked centerpiece of a 20-dick circle jerk. Did you get the mail?”

One of the reasons porn women are able to perform is they’re mentally-unstable, emotionally-damaged, just plain fucked-up, so the absolute lowest, least sense-making move is when they have kids. Why a pornette would want to add Breeder to her list of achievements is illogic defined. What kind of mother material comes out of being a pig-on-a-spit between two dicks all day?

I feel bad for the children of porn stars. It would be better for kids to grow up with two gay parents than a digicam whore. That is all.