Posts Tagged ‘youtube’

MORE Funny as Hell youtube comments

Thursday, 24 June 2010

Ah yes, more random funny as hell youtube comments. In Shakespeare’s day, the crowds of rabble didn’t hesitate to throw rotten tomatoes, cabbages and other things when the play sucked ass.  Our modern rabble, er, critics (barely) type instead of throw.

Youtubers are barely a level above real tubers, that is, potato heads.  I include myself in that anonymous crowd of rabble with 55-gallon drums of venom and nowhere to go but to the keyboard.

The human race is insane.  It’s why God didn’t bother to make the Bible make sense.

As usual, horrible spelling has been left intact.


 

I think we’ve all been the lord of darkness at some point in our lives, I’m about to reach that stage

This video has urged me to defecate in space.

sadly, this is not the only time dairy products have been rapped about.

I hope this guy gets paid good, cause i wouldn’t do this unless i was either drunk, or so high i losted half of my brain.

can you take of you bakini?

boomerangs are for people who don’t have friends.

i thought the story was so simple it was almost insulting to the audience. the special effects were like dangling keys in front of a dog.

Shut the fuck up you degenerate piece of shit. Your generalizations due little to compliment your intellect. I know quite a few roofers who could buy your house in full and use it as a toilet.

When I was little, I got raped by puppets too. (smile)

I would like to hire the Angel Force to clean my apartment. It looks like they do a good job.

When I was a kid I wanted a monkey and a semi-tractor.  Now as an adult I just want someone to play with my monkey as a semi passes.

They need to put warnings on the box about how good this new pizza is. I just spent 20 minutes cleaning jizz off my keyboard after I tried the new recipe!

I wish I could coment on this. but I do not want to make a mistake.

I now envy the blind and def.

he has a really nice tan. i’d wear his skin around my apartment for sure.

that almost better than tits

u sir, are and idiot.

White muggers? Is this science fiction??

AT LAST!  A MOVIE ABOUT TALKING DOGS!

I wonder if her dookey is different colorss? Hah, who am I kidding, girls don’t poop.

That poor, poor ottoman. I don’t even know gay men that do this…

i still find it hard to understand why people with an IQ of 5 manage to make millions of dollars by doing jack shit

Funny as Hell youtube comments

Wednesday, 18 November 2009

I’ve been sitting on these for some time, letting the collection grow like magical crystals made of excrement. They’re funnier without context; I’ve mostly forgotten where I found them. Horrible spelling has been left intact.

I used to steam with envy at the two doofii who created youtube and got half-a-billion each from google. Now I think they were underpaid. As this blog makes some people feel better about their own lives, so the subnormals on youtube make my day every day. We begin…


I enjoy things that are not this.

take your filty black hands off me Nigger I love that line and im black

YOU SUCK GREAT BIG GREASY DONKEY NUTS

Hey..we all need a hobby…..and mine is to come in here and drag your sorry ass throught the pig shit.

You love it, and you know it.

You suck at grammar. You suck in real life too. Also, you’re not funny.

Kids talking about bloodshed. This is twisted, but for some reason hilarious…it’s like watching a bear maul someone. It’s horrible, yet somehow hilarious.

LOL ANGRY PEOPLE AND DEAD BABIES ? Im going to jerk off now =D

for the record it would have been funny if she had been skiny, but seeing those fat cankles go up in the air was just gravy.

It’s supposed to be a dream. A really freaky dream. Like she ate a couple of sausage pizzas by herself freaky.

people like this just have mental issues. it’s not natural to broadcast inner feelings to the known world.?

You’d be hot, but your nose is like..wow
Fix that

I’m surprised you can say anything at all, considering America’s cock is in your mouth.

—-

go rape a llama and take your ego with you

shut up, youre a pussy, you hide behind the safety of the internet to insult… well guess what its fucking cowardous. So shut your little mouth, grow some balls and get rid of your fucking vagina. woman.

That’s it…just go back into your balloon fortress…

When you are truly ready to communicate with somebody on an intellectual level, give me a call. Until then, enjoy living out your grandmothers basement spankin the ham to anime.

P.S. your mother sould’ve swallowed you.

it wasen’t ment to be coherent, it was just a bunch of statement thrown into a pile of retards, fuck yous and cunts

Yes!!! Oh my god could you imagine pig hunting with this?!?!?!

i wana stick my cock in the exhaust YA DIG

I just broke my keyboard in rage


some people should not have cameras if they don’t know how to contribute anything worthwhile. This is such an example.

Don’t bother replying, the internet exists for the sole purpose of conveying what I think.

On many days I simply don’t give a shit

Friday, 13 November 2009

Been wandering the web aimlessly lately. I don’t want to get into it now except to say for every murderous muslim cocksucker there appears to be a gang of apologists and appeasers to justify–there’s no more apt word–to JUSTIFY the evil of the death-cult killers. These fools could just have easily ended up in the crosshairs as the next infidel, and yet here they are, defending the shitbirds.

You can be the most vile piece of shit and commit heinous acts, but those deemed insensitive or politically incorrect are treated even more harshly.

It’s a terrible world.

For no particular reason I watched the 12-part youtube docu about mafia killer-for-hire Richard Kuklinski, “The Iceman”, an equal-opportunity murderer. It was not uplifting. Then I watched a docu about Richard Ramirez, The “Night Stalker”, a craven piece of shit the fucking cops whisked away from mob justice. I’ve been an atheist (and now a tepid monotheist) but with these horrible serial killer bastards running around I understand why anyone would doubt the existence of any god, at least a caring one.

My own life is in the shitter. Not really, but it is. Too much shit left untied, unsaid, while other shit is done sloppily. The past weighs like an anvil on my scrotum. I just hate people and can’t seem to shake the feeling that I’m right. I can’t even get the fucking lesbian at work to come eat tacos (ha ha) with me. And no, I don’t want to fuck her, that’s why I can talk to her.

I don’t know if there is such a thing, but there appears to be a dread balance to the world. Things steadily improve but the horrors that counterweigh the good grow heavier and heavier. Smallpox is eradicated, here comes the AIDS. A dictator dies and he’s got 8 bastard sons to take his place. On the rare occasions Good triumphs it’s quickly buried and forgotten so that the next round of fools must needlessly live the same nightmares. I’m so very fucking annoyed with this planet. And there’s work tomorrow, I won’t have another day off till Monday. Work is hell, all work is, but being out of a job is worse (except for the first 20 minutes of waking up).

On many days I simply don’t give a shit. And by “days” I mean “years”.

Giving away Nobels like condoms in elementary schools

Sunday, 11 October 2009

Right on the heels of The Obamessiah’s Nobel Prize, I too awakened to discover this…

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I’m still in shock at winning. But I shouldn’t be, as I was already Time’s Person of the Year in 2006.


Oh wait, I almost forgot!

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Hey, let me be the first to congratulate you. Be sure to bring your Nobel Prize to any participating Arby’s for $3 off.

BONUS VIDEO: Steven Crowder presents: I GOTS’ A PEACE PRIZE!

The United States of Red China

Friday, 9 October 2009

In response to this post, today we have bob:

I like china they will rule the world and take what they want. They have learned from the best , America. Time for America to move over and admit they are becoming a second class debtor nation whoring to everyone and pimping their children to world corporations. In the heart of every American is an Asian waiting to be reborn. American political system and the pimp whores who elect these politicians deserve third world status. America the Banana republic land that I love stand beside her and guide her with a light in the night from china.

bob’s rant arrives on the heels of the Empire State Building lighting up with the colors of China’s mass-murdering regime.

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For those who want a logical, elementary explanation as to why the Empire State Building honoring Red China is a travesty and obscenity, read this column.

For more in-depth of China’s offenses against the USA, go here.

Well bob, unlike you, I don’t like China, their government anyway, but the challenge in trying to explain why a communist government is evil is useless to anyone who’s been indoctrinated in American government schools, which gloss over America’s achievements while highlighting only the bad, and downplay the dangerous failures of other countries, like drug-addicted and genocidal Mao Zedong’s “Cultural Revolution.”

As liberal hero Joesph Stalin said, “Education is a weapon whose effects depend on who holds it in his hands and at whom it is aimed.”

That’s why for liberty to stay, government schools must go.

Stalin also said, “The death of one man is a tragedy, the death of millions is a statistic,” which is why throwing numbers like 70+ million Chinese murdered over 60 years will have no effect.

You’d never know it from America’s chickenshit state-run media but “The Obama administration made history on Sunday September 20, 2009 for allowing the communist government of China to raise their national flag to celebrate the 60 year anniversary of the birth of the totalitarian communist regime that enslaves over 1 billion people in China.”

For electing a commie to the presidency, Obama voters deserve their own flag:

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More Jeopardy! sexbombs (Updated 2017)

Tuesday, 1 July 2008

Larissa Kelly, the first female contestant to win more than 5 games is so cute she shits kittens. She also won a boatload of money during her recent Jeopardy! run. We’re sure to see her again during the Tournament of Champions.

After watching her in action I knew that many nerds, semi-nerds, quasi-nerds and lovelorn sci-fi appreciators would soon have an enormous crush on her. Though modestly displayed, lovely Larissa “had a body on her” and that infintely cute face concealed a lethal mind for trivia.

Cuter than a Care Bear at birth.

UPDATE! Larissa’s sister Arianna played on 08 JUL 08. She’d been on the show before back in January; was invited back due to some “contentious judgments.” I say it’s because of that awesome rack. More cold showers for Trebek.

However, the title HOTTEST JEOPARDY! WOMAN (So Far) STILL goes to:

Now obviously this is a matter of opinion, but as mine is law around here I declare Mrs. (sigh) Farrell the sexiest Jeoputante yet.

Hair, glasses, cheekbones, face, figure: everything about Dorothy was/is a delight. She lasted 3 days and played well. All that sexy synergy and her fool husband (<–yes, jealous of) waited 4 years to tie the knot? Must be quite the nerd in his own right.

Some kind soul uploaded her Jeopardy! intros…you don’t get to hear her sexy Brooklyn accent so the red dress will have to do…

(Be patient, the Champ is introduced last…)

VIDEO GONE FROM YOUTUBE, UPDATE BELOW

I’m not obsessed or anything. Sexy-as-hell women with high levels of smartosity like Larissa and Dorothy offer rays of big-breasted hope to cellar dwellers and misfits alike.

I am both, minus the cellar.

ADDENDUM: I’d take Dorothy over an encounter with the “Kelly Twins”. I hope to hell all three of them never find this post but on intarnets, if they can they will. Ha ha haaa!

2017 UPDATE 2017 UPDATE  2017 UPDATE  2017 UPDATE 2017 UPDATE

Well it’s been 9 years or so since I made this post.  It’s my 3rd-most popular, about 380 hits.

The original Dorothy Farrell vid is long gone but here’s her stats from the show.

Farrell

And an unrelated video from 2016 about nanotechnology:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U1uWp460Dqg

With that out of the way, I’d like to add a warning I wish I could’ve given to my younger self:  while it’s good to be inspired by feminine beauty, forget smart women as a solution to anything.  

A woman’s IQ could be 190 and it wouldn’t matter.  You’re not going to “reason” your way into her heart or anything else, and a woman’s shit-test to prove your worthiness is a shit-test whether created by MENSA or not.  You’re still going to need all of the toys and other social markers of success to get anywhere.

I stopped watching Jeopardy! long ago.  Ken Jennings thought he was hot shit till the AI Watson handed him and that other guy their carbon-based asses on a silicon platter.  The Machines are taking over.  Good.

Western Civilization is on the way out.  It’s a shame because primarily White people–White Men–are responsible for the bottomless list of scientific achievements which have advanced society to comfort levels never thought possible. By handing it all over without a fight to women and SJW retards, the West has devolved into feminine foolishness:  it won’t be much longer—historically speaking—before the entire world is either run by muslims, the red chinese, The Machines or a hybrid of all three.

I’m embarrassed about the ridiculous worship found in this post but I’m grateful to look back, admire its foolishness and move on.  Smart women are not a solution for anything.  You have been warned.  -M39, May 2017 

How I picture government (which still sux)

Monday, 11 February 2008

Second-longest answer: a bicycle with octagonal tires and no pedals, pushed by Black midgets out of breath from singing praises to a fat-assed, self-important rider facing backwards, violently overreacting to obstacles long since passed while throwing handfuls of taxpayer money into the air like confetti.

Longest Answer:

There’s a scene in American Ninja where “Joe” (Michael Dudikoff) is slinking around a warehouse with a sword taken from some lesser-skilled unfortunate. He rounds a corner into an open space…

Four ninja leap down, each holding a corner of a net. As the net drops, Joe simply raises his sword and slices through it, then proceeds to dispatch the idiots.

TO WITNESS THIS BRILLIANCE FOR YOURSELF JUST CLICK THESE WORDS AND FORWARD TO THE 9:00 MARK.

Those four ninja are what government is to me: bumbling, incompetent, arrogant, needlessly complicating things and addicted to unnecessary force. No one on the Net Trap Committee said, “Hey, this is 1985, why don’t we all carry machine guns instead of archaic weapons and when Joe is trapped, we kill the lights and use night vision goggles!”

Government efficiency. Ha ha ha.